Ramblings of A Caffeine Addicted Mad Woman

Wow! Coffeee....Thank the Goddess for these amazing energy beans! I have had a couple projects I am working on to update y'all about. Maybe a few random ramblings.  I want to go into business for myself, but what can I do? What am I good enough at to be successful? What am I passionate about and genuinely enjoy? I am still surprised at how long it took me to have find my answers. I mean, its me. Shouldn't I know me better than anyone? Yes. Yes I should. We should all be so in tune with ourselves that we know ourselves better than anyone. So well, that we don't ever have to know the feeling of doubting who we are again. I know that feeling. I know what its like to grow up living a life where you were expected to sacrifice and abandon all of yourself to make others happy. To have to believe what someone else believes because it was chosen for you before you were even conceived. 

 

I have struggled with my identity and who I am my entire life since I was around 14. Thats when I started noticing that I was different than everyone I was close to around me. That I believed differently and questioned what I had been taught my whole life. This led to the feeling of not being good enough, and shame for being different. See I had to be wrong because they were right. Their beliefs were mainstream and more popular. I had also been taught I would find myself in a not so pleasant final destination for ETERNITY! I couldn't even handle a sunburn! Fire...for eternity. I was terrified. So I tried my hardest to suppress it. To just believe like everyone else, but we all believe differently. We are completely different independent human beings. I struggled hard between who I felt I had to be and who I really am. I am still trying to heal years of guilt, self suppression, anger, fear, shame, and hella bad anxiety. I still have a hard time knowing who I am. I am ever evolving as a person because of this. Its like being stuck in a 2 year cycle of being reborn into a different person. My personality and who I am stays the same, but it is drastic hairstyle, fashion, and interest changing. All because I tried to deny who I was my entire life. Please don't do that to yourself. You deserve better, you deserve to find the peace I am finding.

Sorry, I forgot we were going somewhere. This coffee has my brain bouncing around in my skull like piece of flubber! Answering my questions from the beginning.

What kind of business should I start? Here is what I came up with: Farmstand, Food Truck, Holistic Store, Working Different Festivals, Online Store, Becoming a Independent Teacher or Speaker.

What am I good enough at to be successful? I can make a mean sandwich. I am able to tolerate human companionship on most days. LOL but seriously I struggle with what I am good at. I can cook decently, I am very empathetic, I am good at crunching numbers and do decent with budgeting. I am great with animals and kids and pretty good at encouraging others. Thats it....my only valuable skills. Apparently I am only good at being a decent human. Gonna have to work on that one Sage. Get a hobby gah!

What am I passionate about? Helping others, making the world a little brighter place, being able to heal something or someone. Spiritual Work. Encouraging and Empowering Others, Traveling, Being a Mom and Wife, Being More Self Sufficient. 

What do I actually enjoy? I love to learn new things,  I love music and cruising the mountain with the windows down, camping, rafting, collecting gifts from Mother Earth. Spending time with my Husband, gardening, taking care of my animals and the ones I love, traveling to new places and exploring the nontourist areas, wading in The River. Any river will work, but My River is my sacred space. Wildcrafting, and Survival Skills. I am enjoying my Spiritual Journey and healing/finding myself. 

If only I could roll that hot mess into a career life would be great! Until then I have narrowed the list down and taken a few actions. I have decided to open my own shop! It should be up and functional in a couple months. I will be starting online then adding festivals. We are building a greenhouse and learning so much homesteading things together as a family and really moving forward toward self sufficiency. I will be growing most of my own herbs for spellcrafting and cooking. I want to continue to motivate and empower people. Especially other women. Ladies, we know what we go through on the daily so lets just be kind to each other. I will always try to lift you up and help you through whatever you may face. 

The plan is to help people with healing, intentions, meditations, and however else I can help. This is a service is absolutely free, but donations of either nature gifts, plants, hand crafted gifts, etc. are welcome and will not be turned down. I have had a few people not accept free as an answer. So if you are one of those people who feels you need to give something that is Sage's currency. :) 

Thank y'all for following my musings and ramblings of the day. You guys are awesome and make me feel like I can be me.

Love and Light,

Sage